| Note From Mollie:
Dear Friend, I admit that there is a bit of me that one might call superstitious. I like to think that I got it from my Scottish nanny, Katie, who was a big part of my early years and to whom I credit many of the useful things I learned about life. The superstition that motivates me today is the belief that when something "shows up" in my life three times within a short while, it is a good thing for me to pay attention to it. All in the same week, the topic of the choice between positivity vs. negativity has appeared in two books that I've been reading, Journey Into Your Center by Dr. Erhard Vogel and The Little Book On Meaning by Laura Berman Fortgang, and in much of this week's work with clients. So I invite you to step into a new level of response-ability and consider how your own thinking and habits are affecting your day-to-day experience of how happy and fulfilled you are. Warmest wishes, Mollie |
| May, 2009 Share this newsletter with anyone you think may enjoy it!
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Feature Article: NEGATIVITY VS. POSITIVITY-A CHOICE By Throughout our lives we have developed many habitual ways of thinking, feeling and behaving that turn us away from the fulfillment of living true to our innate potential. In fact, these self-limiting responses have become so habitual that we often don't even notice that we are choosing them. Negativity settles in as a self-denying life partner. In particular, our intellects become masterful at convincing us that negative patterned thinking is the truth, and especially so if we are on the brink of turning our lives around, and living into the positive truth of who we are and what is really possible in our lives. The negative voice within creates a long list of all the reasons why we should play it safe and keep ourselves small and unfulfilled. Habitual patterns of anger, defensiveness, isolation, judgment, and fear, just to mention a few, rise up and return us to old, very familiar ways of reacting to life. We wrap our negativity around us like a warm blanket and feel temporarily satisfied that we have once again held off the unpredictable forces of change. I remember a woman in a spiritual development program I was involved in. One evening she spoke with deep emotion about how she saw her pattern of "uncontrollable" anger sabotaging the quality of her life and her relationships. It was this that she had come there to heal. Not two weeks later, she called me in a rage, punching out one angry reason after another why she couldn't/ wouldn't continue with the program. She was so angry that she couldn't even hear my reminder that the patterned perspectives she so wanted to change were the exact ones she was using as an excuse not to take advantage of the healing wisdom that would be available to her if she stayed. Sometimes we even use our limiting beliefs and patterned negative perspectives as a way of erroneously defining ourselves, and what we are capable of expressing in our lives. We take them on as a kind of false identity. We become so adept at giving credence to limiting perspectives of ourselves that in effect, we build a fortress of resistance that keeps out our awareness and our willingness to choose a more joyful path; one that is a true reflection of our powerful positive essential self; one that is guaranteed to produce a sense of peace and fulfillment. How adept are you with focusing on all of the goodness of life? How long can you stay in that focus, without drifting into the land of negativity, even for a moment? My experience is that many of us actually lack the skills to effectively speak to all that is good. We have a much better command of the language of negativity. It is a significant way in which we have learned to connect, socially. We often reach for the most dramatic event of our current lives, or the lives of others to comment upon. We want to feel special in the amount of negativity we can report upon. Negativity can generate a certain charge within us that is often mistaken as a validation that we are fully alive. It stimulates strong emotions and sometimes, though far too seldom, it can be the stimulus toward correcting unacceptable situations. None of your negative, nonproductive habits and perspectives need be permanent dictators to how you interact with life. It has become scientifically documented that our thinking and emotional responses lay down certain neurological imprints in our brains and that the more often we think, behave or feel in a certain way, the more durable those imprints become and the more likely it is that we will repeat whatever thought, emotion or behavior that is compatible with the existing neurological imprints. Some of what we know about addiction is compatible with this imprinting mechanism, so it is no wonder that it sometimes feels as if we have no control over our own negativity and self-defeating perspectives. The good news, however, is that we are blessed to have very malleable brains. If we really want to live a happier, more fulfilling life, we have the power to rework a lifetime of negative imprinting into a natural inclination within our brain to stimulate more and more repetitions of positivity. Next month’s topic will be about making the experience of positivity in your thinking, behavior and emotions, a conscious choice in your life—how to harness the power of your will to re-mind your brain in a way that it will happily evoke positive responses that are compatible with the new neurological imprints. PONDER THIS:
Tune in next month for more on moving from negativity to positivity. |
Journey Into Your Center by Erhard Vogel Many of the teachings in this book have allowed me to profoundly deepen my experience of whom I am, and subtly, or sometimes not so subtly, alter the way I function in my life. Erhard Vogel is the clearest and most masterful teacher I have met. He is the “real deal”. I recommend his teachings without any reservations.
For those of you who have done the Now What? work, this is Laura’s newest book in which she branches out into sharing herself more from the perspective of the interfaith minister, another facet of what she does in the world. It is packed full of meaningful insights and observations with many examples from her personal life.
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 About Mollie:
Mollie Malone is a life coach and transpersonal counselor. She received her Bachelor of Science in experimental psychology and a Master of Arts in counseling psychology. Over the years she has augmented her education with in-depth trainings within the human potential arena and the study of metaphysics. She has extensive training in the Hoffman Quadrinity Process methodology and is trained in the Hakomi method of psychotherapy. Mollie is a licensed Now What? facilitator and is a certified professional co-active coach trained by the Coaches Training Institute. She is a member of the International Coach Federation, the San Diego Professional Coaches Association, Coachville, and the American Counselors Association. |
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