Dear Friend,

A couple of weeks ago I was in a department store, making a very ordinary purchase. The transaction complete, the sales person wished me “happy holidays!”. When I commented on how far away the holidays actually were (it was only mid-October), she told me that they had started their holiday campaign two days before and would I like to hear about their special offerings? I must admit, this encounter struck a bit of panic in my heart. I wasn’t ready! I was still loving spending as much time as possible in the ocean - not usually considered a winter activity.

This interaction got me thinking about the holidays sooner than I might have otherwise. After I got over my initial panic, I began to notice a certain sense of spaciousness. It really was quite a while before the holiday pace would pick up. I had time to plan how I wanted my holidays to be and how I, personally wanted to be, during them. I knew that I wanted to be 100% true to my authentic self while being aware of the needs and desires of those whom I love. “Why?” you might ask. Because what I know, is that honoring who are and what is important to you at the deepest, most personal level, is one of the key factors in generating your own happiness. If you leave yourself behind, you will never feel completely satisfied.

So, in this vein, I have decided to keep this month’s newsletter simple, and to just offer you some coaching questions to open your awareness to what you really want this upcoming holiday season, and how you might consciously create that for yourself and your loved-ones.

Happy Holidays!

Mollie

Nov, 2008
Vol 1, Issue 4

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Coaching Questions For Tapping Into Authentic Happiness Over The Holidays
by Mollie Malone, MA CPCC PCC

1. What do you long for over the holidays?

a. What, in you, wants to be fulfilled?

For me, the longing is for connection and the experience of being in a matrix of love

2. What is your dream of the perfect holiday season?

a. If you could create a dream holiday season that incorporates and honors your answer to question #1, what would it look like?

b. What are the aspects of that dream that are most important to you?

What about them makes them important?

c. Who are you being in each scenario?

In other words, are you being someone who is present to the moment, flexible, has healthy boundaries, is open to joy, or distant, retreating, and reacting to holiday scenarios of the past.? It’s not so much what you are doing, but being clear how you want to “be” in that “doing-ness” that sets the template for authentic happiness.

d. What personal values or needs have you left out of the formula?

Do you need a lot of socializing to enjoy the holidays, or do you prefer more personal time? Is it a time when you wish for more focus on your spiritual life? Or on your family or friends? Or are you neutral about the holidays? Is this an opportunity for you to give yourself some time off?

There are no right or wrong answers. The goal is to create something that balances your most important priorities in a way that works for you.

3. If you were to receive the perfect gift, what would it be?

a. What about that gift makes it perfect? What does the gift really give you?

b. How would receiving the gift make you feel?

c. What could you do for yourself to give you that feeling?

4. If you weren’t trying to please anyone or gain anyone’s approval, how would your ideal holiday season look?

5. Add any questions of your own that feel important to this process.

I invite you to make a commitment to yourself to do whatever it takes to experience authentic happiness this holiday season. Use these questions to get yourself thinking and feeling deeply. Then, make a plan for the upcoming season that is a conscious reflection of what you truly want and who you want to be.

© Copyright 2008 Mollie Malone, Soul Power Coaching

Book Recommendation:

Unplug the Christmas Machine: A Complete Guide to Putting Love and Joy Back into the Season
Jo Robinson, Jean Coppock Staeheli

This book has been through many printings and revisions and still remains an excellent guide to the how-to of “de-stressing” the holidays and bringing back what is really important to you. Its focus is on the Christmas holiday season, but it seems as if it would be easy to adapt it to whatever traditions (spiritual or otherwise) are meaningful to you at this time of year. It’s been many years that I have owned this book and it is still the one I turn to when looking for an idea on how to cut the stress and bring more joy into the holidays.

About Mollie:

Mollie Malone is a life coach and transpersonal counselor. She received her Bachelor of Science in experimental psychology and a Master of Arts in counseling psychology.   Over the years she has augmented her education with in-depth trainings within the human potential arena and the study of metaphysics. She has extensive training in the Hoffman Quadrinity Process methodology and is trained in the Hakomi method of psychotherapy. Mollie is a licensed Now What? facilitator and is a certified professional co-active coach trained by the Coaches Training Institute. She is a member of the International Coach Federation, the San Diego Professional Coaches Association, Coachville, and the American Counselors Association.

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© Copyright 2008 Mollie Malone, Soul Power Coaching
8070 La Jolla Shores Drive #450
La Jolla, CA 92037